Annal 78: Tale from Chairman Mao

I think it is safe to say that I have proved to myself this week while I am still single.  And it is definitely related to by epic "coolness" factor.

This week has been a little crazy.  I had a midterm yesterday and have one tomorrow, plus my youngest sister and oldest nephew are coming up tomorrow.  My parents are going out of town, so my sister and I are watching these two for about ten days.  I am incredibly excited about this, especially since we are having a little birthday party for my oldest nephew since he turned five today.  But it also means that the three papers I have due next week I have been trying to get done this week so that I only have to edit them while they're up.  I finally finished my last one this morning, so now I just have to study for my midterm, and prepare some information for my topic for a Victorian Lit. presentation.  Did I mention the presentation is on bigamy?  Very exciting.

I discovered that one coping mechanism I have is to play World of Warcraft while studying.  I would study for half an hour or so, and then let myself play for half an hour.  For anyone out there who may read this and actually plays WoW, I started referring to Northrend as my winter home, and began thinking it would be awfully nice to stop there for a pint in between battling monsters and studying.  For those of you who don't play the game, suffice to say that this does not help me with removing my single status.

My other mechanism involved some alliteration ("Cultural Revolution, Cult of Mao, Confucianism") and then evolved into taking events from Chinese politics and applying them to my life.  I compared the competitive examinations of civil servants during the Han Dynasty, and how it allowed for social mobility while really only being open to those with money, to my education.  University is open to 'everyone' but sadly the costs make it difficult for 'everyone' to be able to go.

Yeah, I'm really cool aren't I?

And now... now I am lying on my couch, scarf around my neck, blanket over me, space heater beside me, taking a break while going through my archaeology notes for tomorrows midterm.  Oh, and I have multiple candles lit at the same time.  Might as well make studying romantic, right?

Ultimately, I think this is a cry for help.  I think I need help.  My brain is constantly spinning, and I am fairly certain I left my sanity somewhere.

And I wonder why I'm still single?

Such is the life of a Christian single.

Annal 8: Tale from the Road Trip

Quite recently, as in the last twenty-four hours, another single friend and I decided to go on a little trip.  We travelled to the nearby shopping centre, spent the night (not at the shopping centre, mind you), and returned home just today.  Discussing the topic of utmost importance, why we are both still single, we comprised a list.  Below is our list.


18 Reasons we are still Single:

1. The ringtone on my cellphone is the theme music from The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past.
2. I can quote most of the lines from The Lord of the Rings and she can quote most of the lines from Pride and Prejudice.
3. We spend more time looking at men from BBC dramas than we do real men.
4. We sing opera while driving.
5. We dance while driving.
6. I may have pre-ordered the Cataclysm expansion for World of Warcraft (in my defense, while I set my alarm so I could start playing it right away at midnight, I decided to sleep through my alarm).
7. We take pictures of ourselves with gigantic statues of beavers.
8. Our ideal image of a man is him walking into a room with his hat strategically placed below one eye.
9. My ideal first encounter with a man would involve him calling me a witch (Jane Eyre reference for anyone confused by this).
10. We go for drives on rainy days so that we can pretend we are in the English countryside.
11. We have to drive an hour and a half to find single, Christian men.
12. We are no longer between the ripe ages of 20 and 22 when most Christian women are supposed to get married.
13. Any female friends who know single men only want to hang out with us when they're looking for a "Girls' Night."
14. Whenever I walk into bright light the first thing I say is: "It burns, Precious," in a raspy voice and she laughs at me and thinks it's hilarious.
15. She can carry on conversations with herself in opera.
16. We talk in our sleep (I'm the deep, philosophical one, though).
17. We spend drives coming up with reasons for why we are single and we have as many as we do.
18. I write a blog discussing the fact that I am single.

So whenever you start to feel down about yourself and where you are, read this list--it's bound to make you feel better.


Such is the life of a Christian single.