Saturday 13 August 2011

Annal 51: Tale from the Flying Lamb

I should have known when the lamb came flying that the cleanness of my clothing would be endangered.  I should have known... yet I did nothing.  So when my chai tea erupted all over the table, my chair, and my lap, I had no one to blame but myself.  And so I laughed.  I mopped myself up and I laughed.  Besides, the 21 month old who was behind the flying lamb was smiling so wide and giggling that how could I do anything but the same?

I went for coffee with friends this afternoon.  This is the same friend whose baby shower I attended earlier this week, so her and her husband came with their son and daughter.  Watching their son sparked the conversation on what men think.  This little boy took my keys, his parents' keys, his lamb, even his juice box, and turned them all into weapons--swords specifically.  He made sound effects, he slashed, he dashed, he paused to look at my shiny ring, and then he resumed slashing.  I began to wonder about what goes on in the minds of children and the following conversation ensued.

Me: "Man, I would love to know what kids are thinking at that age when they play."

Friend's Husband (but also my friend... confusing I know): "That's easy in his case.  'Destruction' is what he is thinking.  That and 'I am the hero and I am going to save the day.'"

Little Boy: "Ahhhh!"  His father loses his arm from a bunny ear gash.

Friend's Husband: "Girls are another story.  Any men who have ever understood them have died."

Me: "Really?  So that's why there are so many young deaths?"

Friend's Husband: "Exactly.  They were too smart for their own good and it killed them."

After this the boy contined to plug his ears, make monkey faces, dice me into millions of pieces, throw both of  his soothers on the floor and laugh about it, and spill his juice, my tea, and some hot chocolate on the table.  He did this all to the delight of the three adults around the table.  His sister simply slept, content to be held by her mother.

My lesson for the day then was that boys think of destruction and being heroes (or just destroying everything), and girls simply want to be cuddled.  And I learned that should the general male populace ever come to understand the mind of the female populace, it would result in an apocalypse that may lead to a zombie take-over.  Okay, I added the part about the zombies, but chances are it would happen.

So ladies, don't ever complain that men don't understand you--if they did, they would die.  Go figure.

Such is the life of a Christian single.

2 comments:

  1. Um you haven't met Polly Pocket. Perhaps she really a boy. Lol. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ha ha! I always enjoyed a good sword fight myself, but that probably had more to do with two older brothers and a love of "The Princess Bride" more than anything else!

    ReplyDelete