Yes, I just created the word Emma-ian.
I just finished introducing a friend to BBC's Emma. I forgot how much I love that movie. Watching the bantering that takes place between Emma and Knightley, the way they both hold each other accountable, their comfort and ease with one another, and their ultimate admittal of love causes my heart to jump just a little every time I watch it. Mainly though I think it is Knightley's admittance of love that always gets me:
"I cannot make speeches. If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more. But you know what I am."
To know someone so well that such few words should ever have to be spoken...
That being said, I am an incredibly wordy soul, and so should think my life would be quite dull without good conversation. But it is the idea that I love. The idea of being completely vulnerable before someone, of being able to admit your inability to describe what you are feeling, but to still say, "But you know what I am" and know that they will understand.
What would that be like?
This makes me think of the times I come before God and start to pour out my heart. I then have to pause because I cannot seem to find the words to describe the cries bursting from within me, or the aches that set my soul to throbbing. But I can lift tear-filled eyes to heaven and say "But you know what I am."
And He does.
He knows what I am.
He knows the intricacies of me.
And He loves them.
I find that God is continually amazing me with how He reveals Himself to me. As I type this I am simply floored at the realization that He used Emma to remind me that He knows me and loves me. Who else would know that a movie rendition of a classic novel would get my attention in such a way? Who else knows that one of my deepest longings is to be known, and to be loved despite that knowing? Since the first time I saw this movie over a year ago, this quotation has stuck with me. Truth be told, part of it is on the wall across my room from my bed, so that when I wake up every morning I see it. When I opened my computer tonight I had no intention of writing a post, but found myself doing it anyway.
And that is when it all seemed to come together.
It has been a year in the making, but I think God is finally getting my attention. He is speaking to that secret signature of my soul. Because He created that signature.
When talking with others I have no problem reminding them of God's love for them, and I fully believe it.
And yet it seems to take me forever to learn this lesson.
Or perhaps this is God's way of using words to reach me. He knows that I respond to words, that language and literature and speech are stirrers of my soul. And so He continually 'tells' me that I am loved.
I have never felt more humbled and more undeserving than I do in this moment.
Such is the life of a Christian single.
I just finished introducing a friend to BBC's Emma. I forgot how much I love that movie. Watching the bantering that takes place between Emma and Knightley, the way they both hold each other accountable, their comfort and ease with one another, and their ultimate admittal of love causes my heart to jump just a little every time I watch it. Mainly though I think it is Knightley's admittance of love that always gets me:
"I cannot make speeches. If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more. But you know what I am."
To know someone so well that such few words should ever have to be spoken...
That being said, I am an incredibly wordy soul, and so should think my life would be quite dull without good conversation. But it is the idea that I love. The idea of being completely vulnerable before someone, of being able to admit your inability to describe what you are feeling, but to still say, "But you know what I am" and know that they will understand.
What would that be like?
This makes me think of the times I come before God and start to pour out my heart. I then have to pause because I cannot seem to find the words to describe the cries bursting from within me, or the aches that set my soul to throbbing. But I can lift tear-filled eyes to heaven and say "But you know what I am."
And He does.
He knows what I am.
He knows the intricacies of me.
And He loves them.
I find that God is continually amazing me with how He reveals Himself to me. As I type this I am simply floored at the realization that He used Emma to remind me that He knows me and loves me. Who else would know that a movie rendition of a classic novel would get my attention in such a way? Who else knows that one of my deepest longings is to be known, and to be loved despite that knowing? Since the first time I saw this movie over a year ago, this quotation has stuck with me. Truth be told, part of it is on the wall across my room from my bed, so that when I wake up every morning I see it. When I opened my computer tonight I had no intention of writing a post, but found myself doing it anyway.
And that is when it all seemed to come together.
It has been a year in the making, but I think God is finally getting my attention. He is speaking to that secret signature of my soul. Because He created that signature.
When talking with others I have no problem reminding them of God's love for them, and I fully believe it.
And yet it seems to take me forever to learn this lesson.
Or perhaps this is God's way of using words to reach me. He knows that I respond to words, that language and literature and speech are stirrers of my soul. And so He continually 'tells' me that I am loved.
I have never felt more humbled and more undeserving than I do in this moment.
Such is the life of a Christian single.
I am in love with this post! :)) As of course you must know that I would be :))
ReplyDeleteSo let me say firstly, Emma-ian um...that's brilliant word makeup-age.
Secondly...is that not the best quote everrrrr??? Totally agree. Of all Austen's match ups...I admit that Emma and Knightly's is one of my fav's because I just appreciate so much the fact that they had such a close friendship and that was what the romance grew out of. *sighhh* One highly important question--which Emma version is your favorite?? While I liked the 90's BBC version, I have always loved the version with Gwyneth Paltrow so much because she was so cute in it and I just love Jeremy Northam...but then when the newest one came out with Romola Gari I have to say---all time favorite! I love the nuances of character development that we didn't get to see in the previous ones probably due to fact this one is so much longer(which is always a huge plus) but also her relationship with Knightly seemed so much more fleshed out so to speak and I thought Emma's character was played even more relatable in this one. Love, love, love this version. Ok, ok, I'll stop now on my period drama ranting/or I guess this would be raveing.
Thirdly...You drew this lovely work/quote into a spiritual connotation and I just absolutely love how you did this. I never looked at it quite in that light, and it so perfectly demonstrates God's knowing and adoration of us. WHich is of course, the most amazing thing of all. I love being so completely known by Him, and while I can't wait for a person in the flesh to know me like this, He trumps all by far, and always will. Love, love, love Him!
It is definitely one of my top Austen quotes! And yes, Knightley and Emma are my favourite Austen couple as well... I just love the way they interact with each other; they know the good, the bad, and the ugly, and it doesn't change their love! The version I watched was the Romola Gari one--it's my favourite because, like you said, everything is so much more fleshed out and I felt that I could understand Emma's character so much better in it. I actually got a chance to get to know her. I am not surprised at all that it is your favourite as well!!!!
ReplyDeleteGod definitely has to take the credit for the spiritual connotation. I had no intention of going that route when I started writing, it just developed from there, and I am still amazed at the lesson. I found myself stopping today and just thanking Him for such a revelation. I find myself becoming more comfortable in my own skin because I am realizing that He created and loves that skin... amazing, isn't it? I think of all the times I have tried to change or hide who I am, when in reality He saw and knew it all and it never stopped Him from loving me... Like you, I can hardly wait for someone in the flesh and know and love me, but God is showing me His love... and now I could go on but I really should stop!
I hope you know, Jeanine, that you are still in my thoughts and prayers, and that you realize what a blessing your comments and your posts have been! Thank-you!