Sunday, 15 May 2011

Annal 1: Tales from the Staffroom

Annals of a Christian Single
For anyone who has ever been a member of that sect of Christians rarely spoken of... or to, for that matter, this blog is dedicated to you.  That’s right, I’m talking to those of you who belong to the group whose status seems to boggle the minds of most church-goers.  I am referring to the singles.  This does not mean the thirteen year olds who are not allowed to date, though I’m sure their lives are rough because of it, but am talking to those of you who find yourselves with a sort of stigma attached to you due to your relational status, or rather lack thereof of one.  I bring to you my tales from Singledom in hopes that you will find peace and hope in your similar stories.
Tales from the School Staffroom
I was sitting in the staff room at work the other day, enjoying fifteen minutes of solitude while my students were outside for recess, while filling out a crossword puzzle with another single teacher who shall remain nameless.  We were engrossed in said puzzle when the sound of a male voice addressing the secretary broke us out of our reverie.  Excitement began to bubble as the teacher whispered, “What does he look like?”
In a moment of pure stealth, I leaned to the left, attempting to make out the appearance of this mystery man by looking through the window that separates the staff room and school office.  The other teacher leaned as well, both of us hoping to see the man whose voice held us so enraptured.  Alas, our efforts were thwarted by the glare on the aforementioned window and before we knew it, the man was leaving, and with him all hopes of seeing him.
I looked at the other teacher and she at me, and before we knew it we were jumping from our seats, our crossword abandoned on the table, and were making our way to the window behind the photocopier, separating the blinds in hopes of catching a glimpse of said gentleman.  We moved the blinds, we stood on tiptoes, we craned our necks, yet to our chagrin he had vanished into thin air.  In a moment of pure desperation we spotted a garbage bag in the parking lot and found ourselves running outside to pick it up, thinking perhaps he on whom all our hopes seemed to rest would materialize.  But he was in all actuality truly gone.  We returned to the staffroom, dejected, and fell back into the waiting arms of our crossword.  Such is the life of a Christian single.


  1. The pathetic part is that the whole thing is true!

  2. This is pure genius. Something my single friends and I would totally do :))

  3. That definitely makes me feel better! I reread this post and could still see so clearly my friend and I leaning in unison, running to the window, heck, I can even see the excitement in my friend's eyes, and excitement I know was mirrored in my own! The things we single women do!