Monday 3 October 2011

Annal 70: Tale from my Life Soundtrack

I am currently sitting at a table in the university cafeteria, though not my table.  Yes, I have a table.  There is one spot I come to every morning and sit at.  It had a plug in for my computer, and provides the most amazing view of the mountains and valley where the city lies.  Most mornings the valley is completely filled with mist and sometimes you can't see the mountains, so you feel as if you are perched atop a high place, completely separate from the rest of the world.  Anyway, the point is that I am not in my spot.  I am instead sitting my a table that is filled with people preparing for a political debate that is supposed to take place later this week.  So to not appear as if I am dropping eaves (sorry, but my sister and I had a Hobbit Day celebration on Friday night which means that I now have random Lord of the Rings references flowing through my head) I plugged in my headphones and started listening to my iTunes.  Sure enough I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor came on and my head started bobbing.

Actually, it was less of a bob and more of a Night at the Roxbury vertical sway... though with a hint of subtlity.  Oh, now my foot is going too.

Have I mentioned before how cool I am?  Because everyone sits in a university cafeteria dancing with headphones in their ears, right?  And they do this because they are trying to avoid working on a book review for a class or studying for midterms, correct? 

Now my Last of the Mohicans soundtrack has started to play and I can suddenly envision Daniel Day Lewis running out of the trees that surround the parking lot and through the mist, coming to save me from some impending danger.  That being said, I was actually that fond of his character in the movie, so maybe I should cut that vision short.

I have decided that my life would be much more inspiring if I had a soundtrack for it.  I think of how much better a run or workout goes when I have music to go along with it.  A battle song to help me run faster toward the bus stop when the bus randomly shows up four minutes early (yeah, that was this morning), or Mika's Big Girl  for those moments when I feel like the most unattractive person in existence.  And I want a theme song.  I don't know what it would be, but it must be something that encompasses the quirks of my character... because life is all about me right? 

Don't worry, I'm joking :)

The truth is busting out some dance moves made me think of teaching last year.  I would play some songs in my class, and there was one boy I loved to watch.  His foot would start tapping, and then his body would start to move in rhythm to the song.  Before I knew it he was out of his desk and dancing around the classroom.  Often were the times I would join him.

I miss my kids.  They were an incredibly special bunch, and each one of them holds a spot in my heart.  And when I miss them, I miss my friends and my family.  And then I struggle with some loneliness.  My mom, youngest sister, and close friend came to visit this weekend and when they left there was a vacuum that it's hard to fill.  Somedays I go home to an empty house and feel as if loneliness will swallow me up. 

Which is why I need a soundtrack!  To help me press on and remind me that there is more to life than me and my wallowing.

I apologize for the randomosity that was this entry.  Lately I feel as if there is so much going through my mind, between reading for school, devotions, discussions, and everything else.  My blog is one of the few places where I feel like I can sort through at least some of it.

Such is the life of a Christian single.

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